List for Parents of Sons
I didn’t write this, and am not sure who the author is, but I thought it was worth passing on.
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For those who have sons & those of us who are happy that we don’t!
And you also find out interesting things when you have sons, like …
1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. Ft.
House 4 inches deep.
2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with
Roller blades, they can ignite.
3.) A 3-year old Boy’s voice is louder than 200 adults in a
crowded restaurant.
4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not
Strong enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20×20 ft. Room.
5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on.
When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a
few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a
long way.
6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn’t stop a
baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words “uh oh”, it’s
already too late.
8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
9.) A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even
Though a 36-year old Man says they can only do it in the movies.
10.) Certain Lego’s will pass, intact, through the digestive tract of a 4-
Year old Boy.
11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.
12.) Super glue is forever.
13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you
still can’t walk on water.
14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
15.) VCR’s do not eject “PB & J” sandwiches even though TV
Commercials show they do.
16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
18.) You probably do NOT want to know what that odor is.
19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys
do not like ovens.
20.) The fire department in Austin , TX has a 5-minute response time.
21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make
earthworms dizzy.
22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.
23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
24.) 80% of Women will pass this on to almost all of their
friends, with or without kids.
25.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.
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That is a list I sent ot some friends a few days ago. Here is a reply I got from my friend Liz:
“I am not a son. I don’t have a son, but i am related to one. Here’s a few not
on the list. 1. You CAN light a fart on fire. 2. Do NOT pee on an electric
fence. It WILL hurt. 3. You CAN jump a 4ft. fence on a bicycle while doing
40mph. 4. You can blow the doors off an iroc z28 while driving a 76 dodge aspen.
5. You can bleed the brakes on a vehicle in a matter of hours, but you need a
little sister to do it. God Bless Love, Liz.”
I hope you all enjoy your sons and daughters for their individual gifts and trials they offer.
sons, cat, brakes, marbles, jell-o, funny, humor, dust bunnies
July 20th, 2007 at 10:36 am
Swallowed pennies do not always pass down the esophagus. I have the surgeon’s bills to prove it.
July 16th, 2010 at 7:00 am
try it best .