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Helping Kids Cope

by Jean Lockwood

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So often we hear of people we never thought it would happen to, getting divorced. It is more common now for couples to give it up, than to work it out.
What about the kids caught in the middle?
There are some kids who will be affected in more emotional ways than others.
With Christians and divorce, there is the possibility of them questioning God’s love for them. “After all, if mom and dad stopped loving each other, couldn’t they and God stop loving me?”
Keeping lines of communication open, allowing them to express themselves by letting them vent and talk, and not making them feel guilty for any emotions they may be going through, will go a long way in making them feel secure.
When kids are allowed to say what they feel, without being made to feel guilty,they are able to cope with those feelings in a more positive way.
If they are old enough, let them have a say in things concerning them, if possible. If they help decide on who they will live with (Older kids ) and visitation, they may feel more in control and be able to adjust better.
Never berate or talk down your ex. Kids are not stupid, and if a parent is being talked about in a bad light, often the kids will see through it. It is important to keep relationships with both parents going as strong as possible. This means allowing the kids to care for and verbally express their feelings- even about your ex.
Pray with the kids. Pray with them for strength, courage, wisdom, peace, and strong relationships for them.
Make sure they know that you will always love them, and so will the other parent.
Divorce is often a cause of adults being so self centered, the kids emotions are forgotten about and disregarded.
If you are a divorced parent, or becoming one- be encouraged that you can still keep your faith, and have a wonderful family life, with a lot of prayer, a lot of attention given to communication, and being there for your kids.
It is a hard time for adults, but it is the parents responsibility to make it as easy an adjustment for our kids as possible.
Praying and talking- two things that may hold your family together, even if separated.


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About Parenting and Religion

Family and Religion is about relationship issues within a family, from a Biblical Perspective. Parenting, Marriage, and other aspects of family life will be discussed by Jean Lockwood, wife of Pastor Dan Lockwood, and mother of 7 children. Jean will share her own experiences with the goal of encouraging, and offering hope and joy.

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