Being Liked
George Kramer, over at Fatherhood, has a blog us today about liking someone and loving someone. He talks about his little girl wanting to be liked, and it got me to thinking…
How often do we stop and think about being liked? Not that everyone we know will like us, but I know for me, I want my kids to like me and to love me.
With the responsibilities of parenting, and the reality of Dan and I being the rule makers and disciplinarians- being liked may not always be an option.
I have heard it said that parents are to be parents, and not try to be friends to their children. While I agree with this, I also know there is something inside each of us that wants our children to like us.
From my experience as both a daughter and a mother, I can say that eventually children begin to see their parents as people- with dimensions to them other than just “mom and dad”.
As a daughter, I think I began to see my parents as people when I was an older teen. I began to see more than just the ways they affected me, and more to them than a child looks for. I saw them as people who were infuential with their friends, co-workers, church, neighbors, and society in general.
I began to like my parents for more than the occasional favor or decision that I wanted them to make.
I began to like them as people.
As an adult, I can honestly say that my parents are two of my best friends. We can talk easily, and I can see them for who they really are, their whole person- not just the part that affects me.
Dan and I are in the transition stage with at least a couple of our kids. Our oldest daughter is married, and I believe she is seeing us as people in our own right.
Our oldest son also seems to be beginning to like us as people.
It is a different relationship with adult kids, but it is good.
Being liked is nice. Being loved is great.
Having both is wonderful!
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