Parenting and Religion

Being busy is a part of life the seems to come in seasons. There is so much going on with us this summer, that I have come to the conclusion that life just goes smoother, when I think about one thing at a time.
This weekend we- all 11 of us and a couple more- are going to Kingdom Bound at Darien Lake Theme Park. Now, I am planning what to bring, travel arrangements, meals, schedules, sleeping arrangements, and everything else that going away for a few days requires.
That is as far as I’ve gotten with my planning.
There is, however, much more going on than that. Two days after we get home, we leave to go to a Christian campground for a week. I can’t even begin to plan for that, other than to consider meals and time of departure.
When we get home from that, the little guys and I are going to another Christian camp two days later…..no planning yet, other than knowing when we are leaving and when we are coming home.
In the meantime, I need to get my school year planned out, shop with Shawn for the clothes he will need when he leaves on August 21 to spend the year with New Life Drama, write when I can (money helps make the plans go on), and be a wife and mom doing all the somewhat normal things I do.
Now, we make our plans, and God laughs.
Life is what happens when the plans are being made. Life is what happens when we aren’t paying attention.
I have decided to not pay much attention, to more than one thing at a time.
It’s working for me.
I am pretty much stress free……but then again, the stress of the day before we leave may get me yet.
Plans, yes. Prayer, more.
Please include me in your prayers, as I make my plans. I need them.

As a parent, there are always decisions to make. Each day, each age, each new season, offers parents an opportunity to make a good decision, a mediocre decision, or a bad decision, on the behalf of their children.
One thing that has been pushed by the medical community and by the government for many years, is immunizing children. Not only with immunizations that have been around and tested well for many years, but also with new ones, such as the H1N1 vaccine they are developing. Or, if you prefer a more common term, the Swine Flu Vaccine.
I have already made my decision on this. Have you considered it?
With the new school year soon to begin, and a more widespread flu than was expected over the summer months, the push to have a vaccine for all children to receive, is on.
Anyone who knows me, knows that I don’t do something just because the doctor says I should- whether it be for me or my children. I investigate it myself.
I have looked into this, as I have other vaccines. Like some of the others, this will be one that my children won’t get.
I also don’t allow them to receive the chicken pox vaccine, the hepatitis B vaccine, or the HPV vaccine. I don’t let the doctors give them the MMR and the DPT together, and insist on at least a three month wait in between those two.
I have signed forms at the pediatricians office that state that I am non compliant with the doctors recommendations for particular vaccines, and have been accused of putting my children at risk.
I see it different. I think that as long as a parent is informed and has considered all possibilities, they have the right and the obligation to their children, to make such decisions on their behalf.
The history of coming up with new vaccines and pushing them through has had some devastating results. Look at the swine flu of the 1970’s.
Tough Decisions? yes.
Will you always make the right ones? Maybe not.
Should you have the option to make the wrong decision? Absolutely. You are the parent. Not the Government.

The last post I wrote was about abuse, and in my neighborhood. I had some good advice from many people come from that. I have also seen my own kids being more appreciative of our way of handling things in the last few days.
Isn’t it something how knowing the horror that some people go through in life can change your perspective about your own life?
I have had many women who have come to me for advice, support, and encouragement in one area or another. I always come away with even more of an appreciation of my own life.
Not that it’s perfect. We have financial struggles, health challenges, parenting challenges, a marriage that though not perfect, is continually being worked to make better- by both of us.
We also face difficult decisions, temptations, and trials.
The reason I come away more appreciative, is that when I minister to other women, I am ministering to myself also. It’s almost like I am letting God show me areas in my own life that may be similar to the life of the other woman, where I need to change, grow, and surrender to Him.
One of the challenges I face in that, is to not grow weary. Not become hard. There are some days that I just plain don’t want to be bothered. When I don’t get enough rest, when I am not feeling at my best, or when I haven’t been in the Word enough- I can very easily become weary.
My goal in this life is to always have something to offer. To always be an open vessle to be used by Him. To be growing and able to give of myself, to help others.
So, I guess I need to take care of me. That means learning from the lives of others, getting enough rest, staying strong in the Lord, building myself up in the Word, and letting God use the lives of those I minister to, to touch me.
I have to- my life depends on it.

Knowing what to do isn’t always easy. I had a situation today, that I think may offer some light as to what to do later. Today, I didn’t know what to do, and whether I should do anything other than pray.
There’s a new family in my neighborhood. One of the kids is 13, and a chronic liar. He is also one of those kids my heart weeps over. I knew as soon as I met him that his life is not what he should have to live. Now, I know for sure.
One of my kids saw this boy being dragged into his house tonight by his mother. That wasn’t all he saw. He saw the stepfather begin hitting the boy.
My son was very upset that this kid, who is a liar and a bully of sorts, was being abused by his parents.
Now, we have a dilemma. I didn’t see anything.
I didn’t hear anything.
My son did.
I called a friend who used to be a neighbor of this family, and she told me that there is commonly yelling, things breaking, and other noise coming from their house. But she has never seen any physical abuse.
My dilemma.
Deciding to be involved in a situation that would be easier to turn away from, yet I can’t.
I have decided that I will be keeping my eyes and ears on the situation, and trying to get closer to this kid. Maybe he will trust me enough to tell me the truth. I think he’s becoming afraid to lie to me, because I told him I can tell when people are lying.
I’ll pray for his safety, and his salvation.
I’ll also pray for wisdom and that I have the courage to take a step I really don’t want to take if I see or hear of him being beaten again.
I’m a coward, I know. I like my own comfortable little family, and would love to think that family life is like this for all families. But, the sad truth is- it isn’t.

There is the threat of thunderstorms today, as there has been all week. When I was contemplating the amount of storms raging in this area this week, and how much of an interruption they have been to my plans, I was reminded of how the storms of life can interrupt the things of life.
Storms in the family have a way of disrupting and interrupting relationships.
Storms on the job may have a way of bringing more stress, and possibly putting your job at risk.
Storms that attack your body, such as illness or insomnia, may attack your lifestyle.
Storms that attack your mind, fear, discouragement, and doubt, may attack your faith.
Storms that happen to those around you may make you wonder if it can happen to you too.
One of the ways to not let the storms of life interrupt life, is to know in whom you believe. If you are a believer in Christ as your savior, you have an anchor to hold you and keep you through any storm.
Another thing you can do to make sure the storms don’t disrupt life, is to have a plan about how you will handle possible storms. If you plan your reactions to the things that could throw you off, you will have more staying power. It will be a storm shelter of sorts.
Living through a storm may change some things, and there may be challenges along the way. Knowing you will make it through the storm, and be a better person, having learned how to handle the storms better, will carry you far.
Storms, they happen sometimes with no warning. But when you have your faith, and you have your plan, you will go through them and be stronger when the next one comes along.

Yes, letting go of the kids is a process. At least for me it is.
I have a much easier time when change, or the next level of life comes, if I remind myself that it is coming, and that it is a good thing.
I know that I need to mentally and emotionally prepare myself for the change or the growth that is coming. One way I do that, is to think about life, the normal things of life, and remind myself that my kids are only mine to raise and to love.
Dan and I both know, and agree, that the goal of parenting is more than ending up with adult children.
It is to end up having done the job so well, that we know they know right from wrong.
It’s having taught them the ways of God, and knowing that they have made good decisions, and hopefully God decisions.
It’s in a way, trusting the Lord to keep His word to us, to protect and guide our kids as they move on.
It’s deciding to step back and watch, but be willing to offer an opinion or guidance when asked for.
It’s making the decision to give back the gift that God blessed us with, having done everything we know how to in raising them for Him.

Parenting is forever, but in the process we must let them go.
That’s the way God designed it, and He has our best and their best in mind.
The process of letting go doesn’t happen over night. It begins the moment you become a parent.
The only thing is, you may not realize it and prepare yourself for it, unless you see it coming.
First steps, whether those first baby steps, or those first steps out into the world, are exciting for the child, and scary for the parent.
Letting go, and letting God, will help.